Start Smart: Essential Tips for First-Year Elementary School Counselors

Congratulations! You’ve landed your first job as an elementary school counselor—an exciting and rewarding role where you’ll make a lasting impact on young lives. But between setting up your office and learning everyone’s name, the first year can also feel overwhelming. To help you thrive (not just survive!), here are key tips and truths every new school counselor should know.

• Focus on being a guide…not a hero. You can’t save the world but you can make a difference a little bit at at time. Instead teach the kid to be heroes in their own life story. You will be doing both of you a favor. It will make your job more manageable AND it will teach kids coping skills for the future.
  • Focus on what’s within your control.
  • Celebrate small wins.
  • Refer out when necessary (and know that doing so is a strength, not a weakness).

  Give yourself permission to be a support, not a solution for every problem.

• Focus on prevention more than crisis and putting out fires. You will be called on to put out fires and of course you will respond but use it as a teaching moment.
  • Teach students how to handle difficult times.
  • Teach the other adults in the school how to do the amazing things that you do.
  • Help others realize the resources that they have within themselves to solve problems.

Otherwise, you will burnout because you can’t do it all. You can’t be everywhere at once and you can’t fulfill everyone’s needs.

• Set Boundaries (And Keep Them!) This means setting boundaries with students, teachers and parents.  It’s not selfish. It’s giving the students (and adults as well) a good role model for how we all should live. It’s easy to say yes to everything when you’re new and eager to help. But overextending yourself leads to burnout—fast.
  • Define your availability for students and staff.
  • Protect your lunch break and planning time.
  • Gently educate others on your scope of practice.

  Boundaries aren’t barriers—they’re self-respect in action.

• Prioritize Self-Care From Day One. I bet you went into counseling because you sincerely want to help others. Make sure you also take time to help yourself so that you can help others. Make sure to take time for lunch and for all your physiological needs (using the restroom, drinking water, stretching your body, taking a break yourself after a highly escalated situation). Teachers get plan times, you do not. Create your own plan times. Check in with yourself HOURLY. We always ask students if there is anything that their body needs – do the same for yourself. You’re modeling healthy coping strategies for students, so it’s crucial to walk the talk.
  • Build routines that help you recharge—exercise, journaling, sleep.
  • Create an after-school ritual to separate work from home.
  • Find a counselor community (online or in-person) for support and perspective.
• Build Strong Relationships with Administration EarlyYour principal and other administrators can be your greatest allies—or sources of stress. Building trust and maintaining open communication is essential.
  • Schedule regular check-ins with your principal.
  • Clarify expectations for your role.
  • Be visible and involved in the school community.

  Many administrators see counselors as an extension of their job and will assign administrative tasks. While you can’t always say no to everything, educate them on the value you bring through student, parent and teacher interactions and where administrative tasks prevents this. A strong relationship with administration helps ensure your counseling program is valued, supported, and aligned with the school’s mission.

•  Don’t Be Afraid to Ask for HelpThere is no shame in not knowing. Ask questions, shadow others, and reach out to your district supervisor, mentor, or professional network. You and other counselors, psychologists, social workers are the only individuals in the building who bring a unique perspective and understanding of child development and behavior. Develop opportunities to communicate and collaborate on student concerns. Honor your ability and know-how. Schools will naturally focus most on academics but you know what is best for students emotionally and socially. Oftentimes you will need to push to have a seat at the table to advocate for mental wellness. You can do it – and the more you do it, the more you will be included.
  • Join a local or national school counselor group.
  • Tap into resources like ASCA, Counselor Keri, and Confident Counselors.
  • Talk to veteran counselors—you’ll gain tips, tools, and reassurance.

  You’re not expected to know it all right away!

• Develop an intentional relationship with teachers: Some teachers will welcome you to their classrooms and lean on you for behavior management. Others will be more reluctant and either run a DIY classroom or just not understand the benefit you bring.
  • Take the time to develop a relationship by asking how you can help and educating them on the benefits you can provide to students.
• Get to know support staff: the front office, custodians, the school nurse.
  • Collaborate with them often. Secretaries can have a lot of insight on family situations.
  • Check in with the nurse often – a lot of times emotional dysregulation can show up as physical distress for students.
• Get involved in opportunities outside the scope of your school:
  • If your district has an active counseling department, get to know other counselors at other schools and attend meeting/trainings.
  • Get involved in state and national organizations. It is easy to get lost in the culture of just your school but broadening your perspective will also teach new strategies and increase your effectiveness.
• Keep Track of Everything: Documentation isn’t just a best practice—it protects you and shows the value of your work.
  • Use a planner or digital system to log contacts, services, and data.
  • Track how your time is spent: guidance lessons, individual sessions, meetings, etc.
  • Use ASCA-aligned language when describing your work to administrators.

  A well-documented year helps you advocate for your role and plan ahead with confidence.

Your first year will have moments of joy, confusion, doubt, and discovery. Remember: you’re learning and growing right along with your students. Give yourself credit for showing up, doing your best, and making a difference—one child at a time.